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I’m back!! From a couple of hellish weeks of non-life threatening, but very ugly, illness, tax audits, family difficulties, and friends in distress. And even more. Nothing that your ordinary, death defying taxi dog doesn’t soak up like a dry sponge in the Gobi Desert after a decades long drought. But this time its gotten the best of me.
Apparently, I’m very much attatched to my self-concept as a survivor. “He takes a lickin'; but the keeps on ticking”. Oh, how I love that image!! So, when I can’t keep up with my image, I stop writing. What am I suppose to do? Discuss all my 70 year old’s aches and pains? Would you read that shit?
I wouldn’t.
So; slowly I turn. Step by step. Inch by inch. What do you guys [and guy-ettes] do when you’re in a piss poor mood? When I was younger, many, many years ago, I had the luxury of blaming others. My wife and I used to do our “Virginia Woolf” act in summer stock for years. “On Golden Pond” is better theater. And a more satisfactory role to play. Still, its only human nature to look for scapegoats.
I have this discussion with myself every once in awhile. Bitch and whine? Or take control of myself. I’m embarrassed to say I don’t always live up to my press releases.
I can’t tell you my greatest fears. I don’t know all of them yet. Death isn’t one of them. But that doesn’t mean I don’t have them. So here I am, literally alone and in the dark, at 2:07 AM. Sharing. Questioning. Wondering.
That’s all I know for now. Tomorrow, if it comes, will be another day.
TD
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Filed under: Being Human, Death. And Life., Existential, Friends and Colleagues, Guilt, Meaning, Mortality, Movies, Musings, She & I Tagged: Being Human, Ernest Thompson, Existential, Golden Pond, Guilt, Meaning, Mortality, Virginia Woolf Image may be NSFW.
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Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
Image may be NSFW.Clik here to view.
